Finding a spouse in Skyrim isn’t just about companionship, it’s a mechanic that nets you daily gold, stat buffs, and a home-cooked meal whenever you need it. But unlike most RPGs, Bethesda doesn’t hand-hold you through the romance system. There’s no mini-game, no relationship meter, and definitely no awkward dating sim cutscenes.
Instead, marriage in Skyrim is surprisingly transactional: wear the right amulet, do someone a favor, and boom, you’re eligible. Whether you’re looking to settle down with a warrior companion, a merchant for passive income, or just someone who won’t judge your 200-hour playtime, this guide breaks down everything you need to know about tying the knot in Tamriel. From finding the Amulet of Mara to solving common wedding bugs, we’ve got you covered.
Key Takeaways
- The Amulet of Mara is essential to propose in Skyrim—equip it after completing an NPC’s favor quest, and eligible spouses will offer marriage dialogue.
- Marriage provides valuable perks including a 15% skill-gain boost (Lover’s Comfort), 100 gold daily, home-cooked meals, and potential passive store income from merchant spouses.
- You can marry any eligible NPC regardless of race or gender after completing their specific favor quest, with options ranging from combat-focused followers like Aela to merchant NPCs like Ysolda.
- The wedding ceremony occurs at the Temple of Mara in Riften within a 12-hour in-game window; missing it requires rescheduling, so plan ahead and avoid crime bounties.
- Vanilla Skyrim lacks divorce mechanics—marriage is permanent unless your spouse dies or you use console commands/mods, making spouse selection a significant long-term commitment.
- Your spouse can move between any homes you own, and sleeping in the same house activates marriage benefits even if they aren’t traveling with you as a follower.
Marriage Basics: What You Need to Know Before Saying ‘I Do’
The Amulet of Mara: Your Key to Romance
The Amulet of Mara is the literal gatekeeper to marriage in Skyrim. Without it equipped, NPCs won’t even acknowledge your romantic intentions. Think of it as Skyrim’s version of putting up a dating profile, wearing the amulet signals to eligible characters that you’re on the market.
Once equipped, NPCs who are potential spouses and have had their favor quest completed will offer new dialogue options. The line is usually some variation of “Interested in me, are you?” or “Is that an Amulet of Mara? I’m surprised someone like you isn’t spoken for.” It’s Bethesda’s way of keeping romance simple and optional.
You don’t need to keep the amulet equipped after initiating marriage dialogue, but you do need it on during the initial conversation. After agreeing to marriage, you’re locked in, no backing out unless you’re willing to deal with some console command wizardry on PC.
Where to Find the Amulet of Mara
The easiest way to snag the Amulet of Mara is through Maramal, a priest of Mara found in Riften. He hangs out at The Bee and Barb inn during the day and the Temple of Mara in the evenings. Talk to him about marriage in Skyrim, and he’ll offer to sell you the amulet for 200 gold. It’s a one-time purchase, and honestly, 200 gold is pocket change by mid-game.
If you’re the type who refuses to pay for anything, there’s a free amulet sitting in Maramal’s quarters inside the Temple of Mara. It’s technically stealing, so you’ll need decent sneak or wait until he’s not looking. Just be aware that nicking it might bug out his dialogue if you haven’t spoken to him first about marriage.
There are also random loot drops, some players have found the amulet on corpses or in dungeon chests, but this is RNG-dependent and not reliable. If you want to get married without wasting time, just buy it from Maramal.
How to Unlock Marriage Candidates
Completing Favor Quests
Every marriageable NPC in Skyrim requires you to complete a favor quest before they’ll consider settling down. These quests range from dead simple fetch missions to multi-stage dungeon crawls, depending on the character. The game doesn’t label them as “romance quests”, they’re just standard radiant or story tasks tied to specific NPCs.
For example, Ysolda in Whiterun asks you to bring her a mammoth tusk. That’s it. Hand it over, and she’s eligible. Meanwhile, Aela the Huntress requires you to finish the entire Companions questline, which is a considerably larger time investment. Some spouses, like Brelyna Maryon, have College of Winterhold quests, while others like Farkas or Vilkas are tied to faction storylines.
The key is paying attention to which NPCs offer you tasks. If you’re systematically clearing quest logs, you’ll likely unlock multiple marriage candidates without even trying. There’s no in-game tracker for who’s eligible, so keep mental notes or check a wiki if you’re targeting someone specific.
One quirk: some favor quests are radiant and won’t trigger unless you’re in the right location at the right time. If an NPC isn’t giving you a quest, try leaving the area and coming back later. Skyrim’s radiant system can be finicky.
Wearing the Amulet and Initiating Dialogue
Once you’ve completed an NPC’s favor quest, equip the Amulet of Mara and talk to them. If they’re marriageable, a new dialogue option will appear, usually something like “Interested in me, are you?” Select it, and they’ll express interest in marriage. Agree, and they’ll tell you to meet them at the Temple of Mara in Riften for the ceremony.
If the dialogue option doesn’t show up, double-check that you’ve actually finished their favor quest. Some quests have multiple stages, and the game won’t flag them as complete until you’ve turned in the final objective. Also make sure the amulet is equipped in your necklace slot, not just sitting in your inventory.
You can propose to any eligible NPC regardless of your character’s race or gender. Skyrim doesn’t gate romance options behind player identity, which was progressive for a 2011 RPG. Just be aware that once you agree to marry someone, you can’t back out or switch to a different candidate without reloading a save.
Best Marriage Candidates in Skyrim
Top Male Spouses and Their Benefits
Argis the Bulwark is a solid pick if you own Vlindrel Hall in Markarth. He’s your housecarl for that property, so you get a two-in-one deal: bodyguard and spouse. As a heavy armor warrior, he’s competent in combat and won’t die unless you’re running on higher difficulties without proper gear.
Farkas and Vilkas are popular choices among Companions fans. Both are essential NPCs (meaning they can’t be permanently killed) and are strong two-handed fighters. Farkas is the friendlier of the two, while Vilkas has higher base stats. You unlock them by completing the Companions storyline, and they’re both solid followers if you want a tanky spouse.
Onmund from the College of Winterhold is a mage option. He’s not the strongest combatant, but if you’re role-playing a mage character, he fits thematically. His favor quest is straightforward, retrieve his family amulet from Enthir, and he’s one of the few male spouses who aren’t warriors.
Sorex Vinius runs the Winking Skeever in Solitude. He’s a non-combat NPC, so if you’re not interested in dragging your spouse into dungeons, he’s a safe bet. His favor quest involves delivering an item to a friend, and he provides the standard spouse benefits without the risk of getting himself killed.
Top Female Spouses and Their Benefits
Aela the Huntress is arguably the most popular female spouse. She’s an essential NPC, a strong archer, and has high combat stats. Plus, she’s part of the Companions, so you unlock her through a major faction questline. The downside? She’s a werewolf, which might clash with certain role-play builds. But mechanically, she’s one of the best.
Mjoll the Lioness in Riften is another essential NPC, meaning she can’t die. She’s a two-handed warrior with a strong moral compass, she hates the Thieves Guild and won’t shut up about cleaning up Riften. Her favor quest involves retrieving Grimsever, her lost sword, from a Dwemer ruin. Fair warning: her follower Aerin will stalk you both even after marriage, which some players find annoying.
Ysolda is the easy mode spouse. Her favor quest is fetching a mammoth tusk, which you can buy from Khajit caravans or loot from giant camps. She’s a merchant, so marrying her opens up a store option for passive income. She’s not a combatant, but if you want a low-effort marriage with decent perks, Ysolda’s your pick.
Brelyna Maryon is a Dunmer mage from the College of Winterhold. Her favor quest involves testing out some experimental spells (which temporarily turn you into animals, it’s harmless). She’s a competent destruction mage and one of the few spouses who excel at ranged magic damage. If you’re running a mage build, she complements your playstyle.
Followers Who Can Become Spouses
Not all followers are marriageable, but plenty are. Lydia, the most iconic housecarl, is not a marriage option even though what many new players assume. But, followers like Aela, Farkas, Vilkas, Jenassa, Uthgerd the Unbroken, Iona, and Borgakh the Steel Heart can all become spouses after completing their respective favor quests.
Marrying a follower is convenient if you want a spouse who can tag along on adventures. They retain their follower capabilities, so you’re essentially getting a two-for-one deal: companionship and combat support. Just be cautious in high-level dungeons, non-essential spouses can die, and there’s no resurrection mechanic outside of console commands.
Some players prefer marrying non-combat NPCs to avoid the risk of accidental spouse death. If you’re the type who savescums every time a follower goes down, consider a merchant or innkeeper spouse instead. They’ll stay home, provide passive income, and won’t get themselves killed by a stray dragon.
The Wedding Ceremony: Step-by-Step Process
Scheduling Your Wedding at the Temple of Mara
After proposing to your chosen spouse, they’ll tell you to arrange the ceremony with Maramal at the Temple of Mara in Riften. Head there and speak to him, he’ll confirm the wedding and schedule it for “the next day.” In Skyrim time, this means 24 in-game hours, so you can either wait or go do other quests.
Maramal will remind you to show up on time, and he’s not kidding. The ceremony begins at a specific time window (usually around 8:00 AM in-game), and if you’re late or miss it entirely, you’ll have to reschedule. Missing the wedding doesn’t break the engagement, but your spouse will be disappointed and you’ll need to talk to Maramal again to set a new date.
Before the ceremony, make sure you’ve resolved any major crime bounties in Riften. If guards are hostile toward you, it can interfere with the event. Clear any outstanding warrants or pay off bounties to avoid issues. Also, don’t start any major faction quests that might teleport you or lock you into lengthy scripted sequences, weddings don’t wait.
One pro tip from experienced players: save before the ceremony. Skyrim’s scripting can bug out, and having a recent save lets you reload if something breaks. It’s not common, but when it happens, you’ll be glad you planned ahead.
Attending the Ceremony in Riften
On the day of the wedding, head to the Temple of Mara in Riften between 8:00 AM and 8:00 PM in-game time. The ceremony is a brief scripted event where Maramal conducts the service, and a few NPCs show up as guests, usually friends of your spouse or random citizens of Riften.
Maramal will give a short speech about Mara’s blessings, then prompt you and your spouse to exchange vows. The whole thing takes about a minute of real time. It’s not elaborate, but it gets the job done. After the ceremony, you’re officially married, and your spouse will move to your designated home (more on that in the housing section).
Guests may approach you after the ceremony to offer congratulations and small gifts, usually gold or minor items. It’s a nice touch but nothing game-changing. Your spouse will also be in a good mood, and you can immediately start receiving marriage perks like the Lover’s Comfort bonus and daily gold.
If the ceremony doesn’t trigger or your spouse doesn’t show up, it’s likely a bug. Check the troubleshooting section below for fixes. The most common issue is being late, if you miss the time window, the ceremony cancels and you’ll need to reschedule.
Marriage Benefits and Perks
Daily Gold and the Lover’s Comfort Bonus
Your spouse will hand you 100 gold per day as a share of their “earnings.” This happens automatically when you talk to them after sleeping in the same house. It’s not a huge sum, but it’s passive income that adds up over time, especially if you’re in the early to mid-game and every septim counts.
The Lover’s Comfort bonus is the real prize. Sleeping in the same house as your spouse grants a 15% boost to all skill gains for 8 in-game hours. This stacks with the Well Rested bonus if you sleep in an owned bed, making it one of the best passive buffs in the game for leveling. If you’re power-leveling skills, always sleep next to your spouse before grinding.
The Lover’s Comfort bonus doesn’t require your spouse to be a follower or even in the same room, just the same house. So if you’ve sent your spouse to live in Breezehome in Whiterun, sleeping there activates the buff. It’s a convenience feature that rewards you for maintaining a home base.
One quirk: if you’re a werewolf, you won’t receive the Lover’s Comfort bonus because werewolves don’t benefit from rest bonuses. Vampires can still get it, so lycanthropy is the only blocker. If you’re min-maxing, consider curing your beast blood before settling down.
Home-Cooked Meals and Their Effects
Your spouse can cook you a home-cooked meal once per day. The meal restores 2 points of health and stamina per second for 600 seconds (10 minutes real time), which is significantly better than most food buffs. It’s a free, renewable resource that’s especially useful in early-game or survival playthroughs.
The meal isn’t auto-generated, you need to ask your spouse for it via dialogue. They’ll hand it over immediately, and you can store extras in your inventory for later. Some players stockpile these meals before long dungeon crawls, since they’re lighter than potions and provide sustained regen.
Not all spouses offer meals, but the vast majority do. Combat-oriented spouses (like Aela or Farkas) and merchant spouses (like Ysolda) both provide this benefit. It’s one of the universal marriage perks that doesn’t depend on your spouse’s profession or combat ability.
If your spouse is also your follower, they’ll still cook for you when you’re at home. The meal perk is tied to marriage status, not follower status, so you don’t lose it by adventuring together. Many players featured on game guides recommend marrying a follower specifically for this double utility.
Opening a Store with Your Spouse
If your spouse is a merchant or has merchant dialogue, you can ask them to open a store. This generates up to 100 gold per day in additional income, separate from the daily marriage stipend. The gold accumulates in their inventory, and you can collect it whenever you talk to them.
The store doesn’t require any setup, it’s purely a background income mechanic. Your spouse doesn’t need to physically stand behind a counter or interact with customers. It’s Bethesda’s abstracted way of giving married players a passive gold stream without complex shop management.
Not all spouses have the merchant option. Characters like Ysolda, Taarie, and Romlyn Dreth are natural merchants, so they’ll offer the store dialogue. Combat-focused spouses like Aela or Vilkas won’t have this option. If passive income is a priority, marry a merchant-class NPC.
The store mechanic is especially useful if you’re role-playing a non-adventurer character or if you’re in the late game and want a steady trickle of gold without grinding dungeons. Combined with the daily marriage stipend, you’re looking at 200 gold per day for doing absolutely nothing.
Choosing and Setting Up Your Marital Home
Available Housing Options for Couples
Your spouse can move into any player-owned home in Skyrim, including houses purchased in major cities, Hearthfire homes you build yourself, and even faction housing like the Arch-Mage’s Quarters in the College of Winterhold. The game doesn’t restrict where your spouse can live, so pick whatever fits your playstyle.
The most popular starter home is Breezehome in Whiterun, which costs 5,000 gold. It’s centrally located, easy to access, and available early in the game. The downside is it’s small and lacks space for extensive crafting stations. If you’ve got the Hearthfire DLC, building a custom home in Falkreath, Hjaalmarch, or The Pale offers more room and flexibility.
Some players prefer Proudspire Manor in Solitude, the largest and most expensive home at 25,000 gold. It’s overkill for just marriage, but if you’re swimming in septims and want a prestigious address, it’s the top-tier option. Vlindrel Hall in Markarth and Honeyside in Riften are mid-tier alternatives with unique aesthetics.
If you don’t own a home when you get married, your spouse will default to living in their original location. For example, if you marry Ysolda and don’t specify a home, she’ll stay in Whiterun. You can always purchase a house later and move them. Players often discuss character builds and optimal housing setups for different playstyles.
How to Move Your Spouse Between Homes
Moving your spouse is simple: talk to them and select the dialogue option “I think we should move.” They’ll ask where you want to relocate, and you can choose from any home you own. The move happens instantly, no loading screens or waiting periods. They’ll teleport to the new location the next time you enter that house.
One limitation: you can only move your spouse to homes you legally own. You can’t send them to a random inn or a location you don’t have property rights to. If you sell a house (possible with mods but not in vanilla), your spouse will revert to their default location until you assign them a new home.
Some players run into bugs where the spouse doesn’t move properly. If this happens, try leaving the area, waiting 24-48 in-game hours, then checking the new house. Skyrim’s NPC pathing can glitch, especially if you’re moving them mid-quest or while they’re set as a follower. Dismissing them as a follower before moving usually prevents issues.
You can move your spouse as many times as you want, there’s no limit or penalty. If you’re constantly relocating for role-play reasons or because you’ve built a new Hearthfire home, feel free to shuffle them around. They’ll always bring their marriage perks (daily gold, Lover’s Comfort, meals) to whatever location you choose.
Common Marriage Issues and How to Fix Them
Wedding Not Starting or Spouse Not Appearing
If the wedding ceremony doesn’t start, the most common culprit is timing. You need to be at the Temple of Mara between 8:00 AM and 8:00 PM in-game time on the scheduled day. If you fast-travel to Riften at 9:00 PM, you’ve missed the window. Wait or sleep until the next morning and check again.
Another frequent issue: active crime bounties in Riften. If guards are hostile or you have an outstanding warrant, the ceremony can bug out. Pay off your bounty or serve jail time before the wedding. Some players also report that being in the middle of a major quest (especially Thieves Guild or Dark Brotherhood missions) can interfere. Finish or pause those storylines before tying the knot.
If your spouse-to-be isn’t showing up at the temple, they might be stuck in their original location due to a pathing bug. Try fast-traveling away, waiting 24-48 hours, then returning. If that doesn’t work, reload a save from before you scheduled the wedding and try again. Skyrim’s radiant AI can break if too many scripts are running simultaneously.
On PC, you can use console commands to force-start the wedding or teleport your spouse. Type player.moveto [RefID] to teleport to your spouse, or prid [RefID] followed by moveto player to bring them to you. Be cautious with console commands, they can break questlines if used incorrectly. According to long-form features on game bugs, Skyrim’s marriage system is notoriously script-heavy.
Can You Remarry or Divorce in Skyrim?
Vanilla Skyrim has no divorce mechanic. Once you’re married, you’re married for life, or until your spouse dies. There’s no dialogue option to break up, and Maramal won’t let you remarry if your spouse is still alive. Bethesda designed marriage as a permanent choice, which is either commitment or a design oversight depending on your perspective.
If your spouse dies (either through combat or “accidents”), you technically can remarry, but only with console commands on PC or mods. In vanilla gameplay, even if your spouse dies, the game still considers you married, and Maramal won’t conduct another ceremony. The “widowed” status isn’t recognized by the marriage system.
On PC, players use the console command resetquest RelationshipMarriage followed by setstage RelationshipMarriage 10 to reset the marriage quest. This clears your marital status and lets you propose to someone new. Be warned: this can cause bugs, especially if you had children or stored items in your marital home. Always back up saves before messing with marriage commands.
Mods offer cleaner solutions. Popular options like Marriage All or Divorce Mod let you end marriages, remarry, or even marry multiple spouses. These mods rewrite the marriage scripts to add flexibility Bethesda didn’t include. If you’re on console (Xbox or PlayStation), mod availability depends on your platform, Xbox has more options than PlayStation due to Sony’s restrictions.
For players who want to “undo” a marriage without mods or commands, the only option is reloading an old save from before the wedding. Not ideal if you’ve put in dozens of hours since then, but it’s the cleanest vanilla solution. Marriage in Skyrim is one of those mechanics Bethesda didn’t fully flesh out, leaving the community to patch in quality-of-life features.
Conclusion
Marriage in Skyrim is one of those mechanics that’s easy to overlook but surprisingly rewarding once you engage with it. The 15% skill boost from Lover’s Comfort alone makes it worthwhile for anyone leveling multiple skills, and the daily gold and home-cooked meals are solid quality-of-life perks. Whether you’re min-maxing for efficiency or just want a cozy role-play experience, finding the right spouse adds a layer of depth to your Dragonborn’s story.
The system isn’t without its quirks, Bethesda’s scripting can be janky, and the lack of divorce options feels restrictive, but the core loop is straightforward. Grab the Amulet of Mara, do some favors, attend a quick ceremony, and you’re set. Pick a spouse who complements your playstyle, whether that’s an essential follower who can’t die or a merchant who pads your wallet.
If you run into bugs, don’t panic. Most issues have workarounds, and the Skyrim community has been troubleshooting marriage glitches since 2011. Worst case, there’s always console commands or mods to smooth things over. Now get out there, find your Amulet of Mara, and start shopping for a house in Whiterun.
